April 23, 2009

Skype: The New Evil?

Don't say I didn't warn you. If this Skype phenomenon continues, it will be massively disruptive to society. (For those who do not know, Skype is basically a technology that allows you to talk to people via a small camera on your laptop without incurring long distance charges.) I was in a New York City hotel last week, and three different people were in the lobby talking out loud to their laptops at the same time. How fucking annoying.

And these weren't quiet, gentle little conversations, like what you would have on a cell phone. No, they were whooping it up, talking really loud and being really animated - because they were seeing each other on the screen. Watching this happen with three different people all at the same time made me realize the serious damage this technology could have on the peace and quiet in this world. They were so loud, and each was trying to move away from the other Skype users (because THEY were being loud). Ultimately, each Skype user ended up in their own individual corner of the lobby, so all the normal people were trapped in a triangle of people yelling at their laptops. Great. Just great.

It's a confusing product. I guess it's for people who are rich enough to own a laptop, but too poor to pay for a phone call? If you want to see their target demographic, check out the photo shown on the Skype home page. To me, it looks like two raggedy-dressed homeless girls who probably just stole your laptop at the train station and are trying to scrounge up enough change out of the one girl's shoes to catch the 2:20 pm to get-the-fuck-out-of-dodge so they can call their pot dealer for free using your computer. These are the people who are using Skype.

You can see where this is headed, can't you? Everyone will be talking out loud to their laptops everywhere. It's going to be so much worse than cell phones.

I'm confused why people would even want to use this technology - do you really want someone else to see you when you talk to them on the "phone"? Do you really want to see them?? That's a little much, isn't it? First of all, you have to be all dressed up and looking good when you use Skye. Imagine if you had to check to see if anything was in your teeth every time you answered the phone. You'd go insane.

The fact is that I'm either looking so bad and/or naked at home that I would basically never use Skype. How are you supposed to roll your eyes at the other person and watch TV on mute, if they can see you the whole time? This technology is not for me.

5 comments:

  1. Being naked while using Skype is half the point! When my girlfriend and I are away for a long period of time, I make her get naked so I can see!

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  2. OK, now for THAT use, I approve of the technology!

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  3. Very funny and I agree with a lot of your comments. Yet another technology (like cell phones, Walkmans, iPods) that tune people out and create more ambient noise!

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  4. "The fact is that I'm either looking so bad and/or naked at home that I would basically never use Skype. How are you supposed to roll your eyes at the other person and watch TV on mute, if they can see you the whole time? This technology is not for me."

    funniest thing ever.

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